IllinoisTimes - Advice Goddess http://illinoistimes.com/articles.sec-109-1-advice-goddess.html Fri, 18 Apr 14 00:00:00 -0500 en hourly 1 Watching paint die http://illinoistimes.com/article-13767-watching-paint-die.html Watching paint die
 I’ve been dating a girl I really like for six weeks. She pays her rent with a 9-to-5 job but studied painting at art school and wants to make it her career. Unfortunately, I don’t like her p...]]>
Six-month lay away http://illinoistimes.com/article-13728-six-month-lay-away.html Six-month lay away
For my New Year’s resolution, I committed to not having sex for the first six months of the year and then another six months from whenever I start dating someone. I’ve never been good at waiting. ...]]>
The fastidious and the furious http://illinoistimes.com/article-13685-the-fastidious-and-the-furious.html The fastidious and the furious
My boyfriend of nine years is extremely messy, while I prefer things tidy and clean. Cajoling, asking and flat-out begging him for consideration and help on this hasn’t worked, nor have tactics like...]]>
Serf’s up! http://illinoistimes.com/article-13653-serf%25E2%2580%2599s-up_.html Serf’s up!
 My boyfriend works at a hardware store and can fix things, and in the past six months, his sister and her husband have asked him to install their new kitchen faucet, mend their fence (with the h...]]>
Save the wails http://illinoistimes.com/article-13647-save-the-wails.html Save the wails
Are guys scared of politically active women? My boyfriend of two months just broke up with me over my support for animal rights, and I’ve generally had difficulty keeping boyfriends because of this....]]>
Fool disclosure http://illinoistimes.com/article-13596-fool-disclosure.html Fool disclosure
On a business trip, I drank WAY too much with some work friends and ended up kissing a random girl I met at a bar, despite my having a girlfriend I love very much. I feel horrible. Until now, I’d ne...]]>
When Harry met hairy http://illinoistimes.com/article-13552-when-harry-met-hairy.html When Harry met hairy
 My girlfriend of six months just stopped shaving her legs and armpits. I think she is so sexy – except for this. Recently, I asked her whether she’d shave again, and she snapped that shaving...]]>
The grating outdoors http://illinoistimes.com/article-13528-the-grating-outdoors.html The grating outdoors
This great girl I’ve been dating just invited me on a camping trip. Frankly, there is nothing I would like to do less. I hate camping, and I won’t know anyone but her. The trip is three days with...]]>
Pamper-resistant http://illinoistimes.com/article-13501-pamper-resistant.html Pamper-resistant
After six years with a lazy and ambitionless boyfriend, I found a funny, loyal, caring boyfriend I love, with a solid career and a good work ethic. He pays his share of our bills and even does our lau...]]>
A good time was jihad by all http://illinoistimes.com/article-13466-a-good-time-was-jihad-by-all.html A good time was jihad by all
 I’m good friends with the woman next door, but she and her husband fight constantly in front of me and others. Recently, we were all in their car. She was driving, and he repeatedly told her e...]]>
Cower rangers http://illinoistimes.com/article-13442-cower-rangers.html Cower rangers
I read your recent columns about guys who are too shy to ask women out. You seem to think it’s okay for women to make quick judgments about a shy man’s worth because his shyness is their first imp...]]>
Dinner and a second mortgage? http://illinoistimes.com/article-13422-dinner-and-a-second-mortgage.html Dinner and a second mortgage?
 I know you’ve discussed how the guy should pay on the first few dates. I’ve been dating a pretty fabulous woman for a month, and I’m dipping into my savings to take her out to the sort of...]]>
Weirding bells are ringing http://illinoistimes.com/article-13385-weirding-bells-are-ringing.html Weirding bells are ringing
 I am a bridesmaid in a wedding in four months and haven’t been able to think of a guy to be my date. I recently met a guy at a party. He is the friend of a friend and is cute and funny and see...]]>
Down on his luxe http://illinoistimes.com/article-13333-down-on-his-luxe.html Down on his luxe
I’ve always loved surprising my wife with expensive jewelry and lavish vacations. However, I lost my job, and my new job pays far less. There’s barely money for necessities, let alone luxuries. My...]]>
Kin I see you naked? http://illinoistimes.com/article-13266-kin-i-see-you-naked.html Kin I see you naked?
I’m 22 and deeply in love with the wrong person – my uncle-in-law (my mom’s sister’s husband). We started confiding in each other, one thing led to another, and we’ve been sleeping together...]]>
The rat of the litter http://illinoistimes.com/article-13301-the-rat-of-the-litter.html The rat of the litter
 For two months, I’ve been dating an awesome guy. He does sweet things like leaving cute notes on my windshield, but I worry about how he looks up to his older brother, who isn’t the greatest...]]>
Wimp daddy http://illinoistimes.com/article-13262-wimp-daddy.html Wimp daddy
 A woman wrote you about flirting relentlessly with a male classmate who seemed interested in her but may have been too timid to ask her out. You asked her, “If a man can’t endure a possible...]]>
Flesh prince http://illinoistimes.com/article-13201-flesh-prince.html Flesh prince
My boyfriend of two years has always disparaged gentlemen’s clubs. I truly believed him until he visited his family and I searched Google Maps on his computer for something in his hometown. The text...]]>
Some like it hot mess http://illinoistimes.com/article-13187-some-like-it-hot-mess.html Some like it hot mess
 Why do “helpless” women have men constantly doting on them, while women like me are deemed “too strong”? I was raised by a 1970s feminist and single mother. (“A woman needs a man like...]]>
Took the wind out of her zales http://illinoistimes.com/article-13144-took-the-wind-out-of-her-zales.html Took the wind out of her zales
Around Valentine’s Day, my beloved boyfriend of a year kept hinting about a big surprise. He’d been talking about moving in with me, and I was expecting a proposal and a ring. I got a fondue pot....]]>
Moody call http://illinoistimes.com/article-13118-moody-call.html Moody call
Ten months ago, while studying abroad, I had one wonderful night with a girl. We kissed and danced the night away. She lives in Brazil, but we’ve communicated regularly via Skype and email. I’ve n...]]>
Crappily ever after http://illinoistimes.com/article-13086-crappily-ever-after.html Crappily ever after
My husband of a year is the most selfish, inconsiderate, cold-shouldered man I’ve ever known. He’s 24; I’m 22. He behaved similarly when we were dating, but when he proposed, he made promises to...]]>
The butt stops here http://illinoistimes.com/article-13079-the-butt-stops-here.html The butt stops here
 My husband and I both smoked pot regularly, but I quit several years ago, and he began smoking nightly. I kept encouraging him to quit because it makes him mentally disappear. He goes through pe...]]>
Mouse ado about nothing http://illinoistimes.com/article-13027-mouse-ado-about-nothing.html Mouse ado about nothing
I’ve tried to be open-minded, but I’ve decided that men are givers and women are takers. I study at my local coffeehouse. I am interested in this woman who comes in and often unplug my computer an...]]>
Golden pond scum http://illinoistimes.com/article-13001-golden-pond-scum.html Golden pond scum
 I went to meet my girlfriend’s 90-year-old father. They have a conflicted relationship. He doesn’t “agree” with his daughter’s homosexuality, generally looks down on women, and believe...]]>
Tease for two http://illinoistimes.com/article-12955-tease-for-two.html Tease for two
I’m dating a wonderful guy I’m totally in love with. He’s always looked up to his older brother, a very attractive guy who’s a real lady’s man. I’ve found myself behaving in some unsettling ways when we hang out with his brother, like fixing myself up beforehand like I’ve got a big date. I realized that I want his brother to want me. I get a very naughty feeling when he looks m...]]>
Social notworking http://illinoistimes.com/article-12936-social-notworking.html Social notworking
 My 40-something younger brother has been “friending” my hot female friends on Facebook, women I have befriended in real life whom he’s never even met! I said nothing at first. Then, one of...]]>
Office despot http://illinoistimes.com/article-12909-office-despot.html Office despot
 I just started a new job. My boss and I were having a meeting, and he started asking me about my personal life – whether I have a boyfriend, who I live with. No biggie. He then began grilling ...]]>
Another brick in the wallow http://illinoistimes.com/article-12875-another-brick-in-the-wallow.html Another brick in the wallow
I’ve missed countless opportunities because I fail to speak up in the moment. A pretty girl smiles at me on the bus. Ten minutes later, I will wish I’d stayed on the bus and struck up a co...]]>
Going code turkey http://illinoistimes.com/article-12860-going-code-turkey.html Going code turkey
I broke up with a boyfriend a few years ago because I wasn’t getting what I wanted from him. I’d give him subtle cues, and when he didn’t respond in the ways I was hoping for, I blam...]]>