IllinoisTimes - News Quirks http://illinoistimes.com/articles.sec-115-1-news-quirks.html Sat, 30 May 15 00:00:00 -0500 en hourly 1 Better world without people http://illinoistimes.com/article-15537-better-world-without-people.html Better world without people
Curses, foiled againPolice said they received their “strongest investigative lead” in the case of 80 frozen pizzas stolen from a warehouse in Gambell, Alaska, when John Koozaata, 29, and Lewis Ooz...]]>
Fruitful gesture http://illinoistimes.com/article-15500-fruitful-gesture.html Fruitful gesture
Curses, foiled again• Moments after robbing a tourist of her gold chain on a street in Miami Beach, Fla., the gunman returned to the scene in his Mercedes and confronted the victim about the poor qu...]]>
What could go wrong? http://illinoistimes.com/article-15471-what-could-go-wrong.html What could go wrong?
Curses, foiled againPolice were able to link Christopher Furay, 33, to six bank robberies in Pittsburgh, Pa., by his distinctive red beard. After media coverage of the first four robberies, he wore a ...]]>
When guns are outlawed http://illinoistimes.com/article-15442-when-guns-are-outlawed.html When guns are outlawed
Curses, foiled again• A funeral procession thwarted a man’s attempt to rob a 79-year-old woman in San Antonio, Texas. “We were going really, really slow, so as we passed this bus stop, there was...]]>
School daze http://illinoistimes.com/article-15423-school-daze.html School daze
Curses, foiled againPolice responding to a drug complaint in Richmond, Va., spotted two men who began running away. One of the fleeing men, later identified as Darnell Elliotte, 20, fired several shot...]]>
Firebuggery http://illinoistimes.com/article-15390-firebuggery.html Firebuggery
Curses, foiled again• Tyler Lankford, 21, entered a bakery with a loaded and cocked revolver, pointed it at the 58-year-old clerk and demanded money, according to police in McKeesport, Pa. The clerk...]]>
Game of drones http://illinoistimes.com/article-15341-game-of-drones.html Game of drones
Curses, foiled againCass Alder, 22, bought table napkins made with images of $100 bills on them, then cut out the images, glued them onto paper and tried passing one of the bogus bills at a convenienc...]]>
Opportunity knocks http://illinoistimes.com/article-15334-opportunity-knocks.html Opportunity knocks
Curses, foiled again• Joey Patterson, 22, eluded Idaho authorities for several months, but then he posted his whereabouts on Facebook. He invited friends to play softball at Armory Softball Field in...]]>
Thank you for your service http://illinoistimes.com/article-15279-thank-you-for-your-service.html Thank you for your service
Curses, foiled againA burglar used the homeowner’s devices to log on to porn, YouTube and his Facebook account, but authorities in Monroe County, Fla., quickly identified him because he forgot to lo...]]>
Bowling for hollers http://illinoistimes.com/article-15261-bowling-for-hollers.html Bowling for hollers
Curses, foiled again• Brian J. Byers crashed his car while driving drunk and then poured water on the road so it would look like black ice caused the crash, according to police in Sparta, N.J. Byers...]]>
Nothing to fear here http://illinoistimes.com/article-15222-nothing-to-fear-here.html Nothing to fear here
Curses, foiled againRocco Tumbarello, 41, stole stuff from a home in West Boynton, Fla., authorities there said, but he didn’t get far. He lives across the street. The victim came home to find his 4...]]>
Law-makery http://illinoistimes.com/article-15195-law-makery.html Law-makery
Curses, foiled againBritish police investigating the theft of tools and a shower stall from a home remodeling project in Crawley arrested Ryan Marsh, 18, after he returned to the job site and tried to...]]>
Bureaucracy follies http://illinoistimes.com/article-15163-bureaucracy-follies.html Bureaucracy follies
Curses, foiled againGregory Dike, 38, received 11 years in jail for robbing 10 banks across England. Police arrested him after he booked a taxi for his getaway, but the driver realized what was happen...]]>
Stand-your-ground state http://illinoistimes.com/article-15134-stand-your-ground-state.html Stand-your-ground state
Curses, foiled again• Police thought Luis Moreno Jr., 26, was driving solo in a carpool lane in Fort Lee, N.J., but when they stopped him, he showed he was legal by pointing out two men in the back...]]>
Victim of the week http://illinoistimes.com/article-15107-victim-of-the-week.html Victim of the week
Curses, foiled againJeffrey Wood, 19, announced a robbery at a convenience store in Washington, D.C., where two police detectives were shopping. They were in plain clothes but one had her badge hangin...]]>
Tax dollars at work http://illinoistimes.com/article-15090-tax-dollars-at-work.html Tax dollars at work
Curses, foiled again• Police looking for a bank robber in New Kensington, Pa., found suspect Shane Lindsey, 32, two blocks away at a restaurant where he stopped for chicken and biscuits. Officers en...]]>
Blessing in disguise http://illinoistimes.com/article-15053-blessing-in-disguise.html Blessing in disguise
Curses, foiled againClayton Dial, 23, pulled a gun and demanded cash at a Japanese restaurant in Champaign, Ill., only to have chef Tetsuji Miwa thwart the robbery. “I instantly grabbed my sushi kni...]]>
Non-surprise of the week http://illinoistimes.com/article-15032-non-surprise-of-the-week.html Non-surprise of the week
 Curses, foiled again• Police said Eric Frey, 29, handed a pizza shop employee in Uniontown, Pa., a note written on toilet paper. “I have a gun,” it read. “Give me $300.” The worker hit...]]>
Flights of fancy http://illinoistimes.com/article-14989-flights-of-fancy.html Flights of fancy
Curses, foiled againPolice charged Kahlif Aleem Buggs, 32, with fraudulent use of debit cards after Tamara Thomas noticed a family “shopping like it was Christmas” at a Family Dollar store in DeKa...]]>
Slightest provocation http://illinoistimes.com/article-14971-slightest-provocation.html Slightest provocation
Curses, foiled again• Fugitive Jacob Moore, 25, tried to divert police attention from his home where officers were preparing to execute a warrant by calling in a bomb threat to an elementary school ...]]>
Can we all get along? http://illinoistimes.com/article-14930-can-we-all-get-along.html Can we all get along?
Curses, foiled againAfter police linked Ralik Hansen, 28, to a smash-and-grab robbery at a jewelry store in New York City, he eluded them for seven months until a FedEx delivery driver knocked on the ...]]>
Second thoughts about being first http://illinoistimes.com/article-14905-second-thoughts-about-being-first.html Second thoughts about being first
Curses, foiled againWhen Damontay Wright, 19, drove himself unaccompanied to a road test facility in Jonesboro, Ark., for his driver’s license, a police officer approached to ticket him for driving ...]]>
Caught stupid http://illinoistimes.com/article-14904-caught-stupid.html Caught stupid
Compiler’s note: Chronicling human folly gets harder every year because as foibles proliferate, the odd seems commonplace. These unbelievable-but-true news stories, however, stand out as the year’...]]>
Name games http://illinoistimes.com/article-14848-name-games.html Name games
Curses, foiled again• Police investigating a theft at a coin laundry in Great Falls, Mont., captured suspect Curtis Dear, 28, after following his footprints in the snow to a nearby residence. They f...]]>
Monumental boondoggle http://illinoistimes.com/article-14808-monumental-boondoggle.html Monumental boondoggle
Curses, foiled againOntario resident Kai Xu was charged with smuggling after border agents at the Detroit-Windsor Tunnel discovered more than 50 turtles strapped to his body and hidden between his leg...]]>
Chairman mayo http://illinoistimes.com/article-14777-chairman-mayo.html Chairman mayo
 Curses, foiled again• After an employee confronted two burglars inside a business in Mulga, Ala., he chased them to a pontoon boat on a trailer hooked up to a pickup truck they had parked down...]]>
Not your father’s KKK http://illinoistimes.com/article-14748-not-your-father%25E2%2580%2599s-kkk.html Not your father’s KKK
Curses, foiled againAfter John Franklin Forbis, 72, was convicted of possessing 850 pounds of marijuana in Columbia County, N.Y. in 1992, he jumped bail and eluded police for 22 years. Authorities fin...]]>
Risky art http://illinoistimes.com/article-14729-risky-art.html Risky art
Curses, foiled again• Alan Knight, 47, denied robbing his neighbor in Swansea, Wales, and avoided prosecution by pretending to be “quadriplegic and in a comatose condition, bed-bound at home” af...]]>
Pot policy http://illinoistimes.com/article-14685-pot-policy.html Pot policy
Curses, foiled againFive beachgoers who were robbed at gunpoint in Dania Beach, Fla., identified Jonathan Warrenfeltz, 24, as one of two suspects by the word “Misunderstood” clearly tattooed on hi...]]>
Ebolamania http://illinoistimes.com/article-14667-ebolamania.html Ebolamania
Curses, foiled again• After police seeking Monica Hargrove, 34, for aggravated robbery in Columbus, Ohio, posted her photo on the department’s Facebook page, the suspect called and demanded the ph...]]>