PITY POT PURVEYORS
If you think sex offenders have it tough, try being an ad rep for a cannabis company. Rapists, under state law, can live or hang out as close as 500 feet to a school or playground. But the law legalizing weed establishes a 1,000-foot rule for cannabis ads – can’t be any closer than that to a school, playground, park, daycare center, etc. Sellers of recreational pot won’t be able to claim any medical benefits, even though the state has a medical marijuana program and sellers of cannabidiol, aka CBD, now tell would-be buyers that their low-potency product derived from weed can replace prescription drugs and otherwise promote health. “You deserve to feel your best,” says one Springfield CBD seller in an online pitch. The new law also restricts packaging. A package of marijuana cannot legally include a depiction of a marijuana leaf – that’s like banning pictures of cows on milk cartons. Our favorite is the requirement that cannabis lotions include a label: “DO NOT EAT” – and yes, the bill has it in all caps and requires that the warning label be in capital letters. Are pot aficionados really that stupid? Guess we’ll find out come January.